New Years... Rs
2011...to 2012
Resolutions. no. But I'll get back to that in a moment.
Responses. I have a few from 2011.
Renovations! Ya!
Revolutions. ... .... Maybe?
Rebellions. again...maybe...but I might keep that to myself.
Redo. Yes.
Revelations...that's deep - and yes, I have a few of those too.
Reactions. No. I choose to respond.
Revival - there's a bit of that too.
Rumors...haHA!
I always hate the whole...resolutions thing because they typically become reso-no-lution. I know a few people that were able to realistically give themselves goals to achieve the following year. But they were the 'goals-on-the-fridge-so-we-can-cross-them-off" kind of people. Good for them. Pat on the back. Even the word RE-SOLUTION gets me a little firey. Doesn't that kind of say that you had the solution once before and it didn't work and so you have to "re"-it? Doesn't really pave the road to long term success, does it.
Responses on Resolutions from 2011
Me? What did I say last yea?. Read more. That's a solid resolution. The goal was just...more. I did that. I finished the Cellist of Sarejevo AND the Bible once more through AND Forgotten God or wait...I did read the Clockwork Angel and the Clockwork Prince which are teen novels...does that count? That's a solid two more than I had read the previous year. I'm pathetic, I know. I think I actually read Forgotten God twice. Crazy Love and two other books lay started on my kitchen table. I really need to take a friend's advice and try audiobooks. Is it shameful that I don't even know where to find audiobooks? itunes maybe. Geh.
Part way through the year I also resolved to blog more...and blog consistently. True - I become less consistent when things are busy at the camp and all of my blogging turns into rugby...but I blogged consistently and if you compare my numbers of posts in 2011 to all previous years (added together). Whammy! I knocked that one out of the park. I don't plan on trying to beat my 2011 number. So there's no RE-solution needed. Just the resolve to keep doing what I'm doing...and maybe getting people commenting again - let's just say that there's a direct correlation to my rugby posts and commenting. One goes up and the other absolutely goes down. oh bother.
So instead of Resolutions this year - I'm writing or doing renovations. Some stuff is great and will still be there and maybe some stuff will get repurposed and some stuff just has to go. I'm not going to get into all of the reno details. But it was nice to start with new couches this last week to start the physcial stuff off swell. I also reno'd the blog...I figured it was time to clean the slate and give myself a background that reflects where I'm at now. Energy, a little chaos, and very busy in the next year.
Resolution Renovations 2012 #1: Read more books than last year. To achieve this I technically only have to read four legit books. Five if you include the face that I read Forgotten God twice. And just to let you all know that I'm being honest...I do not include graphic novels or comic books in this. And seriously, I'd like to tip the scale on having read fewer than half the books on my shelves.
Resolution Renovations 2012 #2: Figure out the 60 slump: I have 66 days in a year that consistently suck for me. March 15-April 15 and November 20 to December 26. They're bad and I'm on the down-swing of a gross yuk yuk. What does that mean? I don't think I can translate it. I don't know what it is...things slowing down, me being tired, Christmas, things getting busy, not enough time...something like that. There is something in me that gets discouraged and maybe a little disgruntled. In 2012 - I want the resolution.
Resolution Renovations 2012 #3: Kick ass on my Black Belt test: Yup - I'll likely be testing on my black best test in December 2012. I don't want to just ace it...I want to be in shape for it. That means actually showing up regardless of how I feel about it, to my insanity work outs at 6:30am. Or doing them at 6pm if I've slept through them regardless of how much I hate working out after work. Time to deal Armstrong, because you've got 11 months until your moment. And a sub renovation that needs a number because "getting in shape" - doesn't really work as a general reno. I want to lose 20-30lbs by December. Absolutely possible...we just got to start renovating.
Rebellion - well I have to...because I wouldn't be a black sheep without a little rebellion in my blood. I'm rebelling against Blackberrys. If I'm given a good opportunity to get out - I'm jumping ship to the iphone. I don't care about hype anymore. iphones are better...Blackberrys have issues - and they're not a family member so you do have to keep them around. Lose 'em while you can before they convince you that the next one will actually be better. Trust me - it won't. If anybody would like a torch and a 2 year contract...just let me know.
Revolutions:
#1 : This is a tough one and it's close to my heart. I want to be positive.No more grumpy C-Bear. No more grumpy-all-the-time C-Bear. I think I can do that. Start small right. I don't think it's all me but I can only affect me. I can be excessively serious all the time and I think I can find it in myself to play more and make time to do the things that I love, especially in my job. Where I can start with this is working more with people and not as much as with my computer. This is my change that I want to start with me. And this change will start a revolution around me.
#2 : The next one starts with me too. Spiritual kick-start. I think I'm good. I'm in a "good" place. But I don't want to be in a good place. I want to be in a place where God is blowing my mind. Where I can honestly say that every encounter with him changes me - because every encounter with him SHOULD change me. And this change will impact through around me. I want to start a revolution.
Redo: I want to redo how I organized and worked with one of my teams this year. I didn't give them my best. And that's on me. People - my co-workers - my staff- my campers- my guests - should always get my best. Specifically this team - didn't. And I'm sorry for that and I wish I could get a redo - which I won't. But I want to have learned from it enough to not do it again.
Do AGAIN: I would also love to do William Fitzsimmons, U2 (except this time I would seat hop because concert-sitters are lame), and Foo Fighters again because they were ALL amazing concerts. And I would love to go back and do AEE in Florida again. Super fantastic. Did I mention that it was great?
Revelations:
I don't think this is the right place to share some of it but I think it will be sooner or later - some of it is still a little fresh and so I haven't completely dealt with all of the emotions. A couple of them came from the AEE conference which was so much more than I expected and from unexpected places in the conference. I was affirmed over and over and over again for who I was and was doing and how I was gifted. I felt beautiful for the first time in a long time. I felt valued. Not that I don't know these things in my home life but I think that as a whole, as Christians and maybe even Canadians (that's an enormous generalization but seriously I got tons of compliments down there), don't speak our compliments, our affirmations, and our praise to each other enough. We don't look each other in the eyes and tell them that they're doing good, that they're cherished, and that they have value. I have been practicing this in one area of my life but have not done that to the other people in my life enough. I'm going to change that.
Hand in hand with that though - my other revelation is that I cannot seek my worth and value and depend on affirmation from other people. That lays an expectation on them that they may not be able to meet. I must seek God for that.
Revival: Even as I type this...I've got a fire lit inside of me. If anything I have said sparks something in you or you have started to think what your Rs are...write them down. Make yourself accountable to them and make change.
The other revival that has happened is [ instigate change ]. It was actually the first blog I started and I don't know why I didn't just reno that one but I started [ the clean slate ] instead. Maybe because I felt I needed something unattached to the old one. The old one hung around and when Blogger made upgrades to their interface - there it was...the Bear's Den staring me in the face every time I logged in. After AEE I started journalling about my facilitator experiences and thought that it would be great to create a space where I could share the activities I do and what happens in the debrief - because they're all different. And then maybe someday - there will be conversations about other people's experience and maybe EVEN - other bloggers posting on it. So [instigate change ] started. Maybe that was the first reno of 2011. It doesn't really count towards 2012.
And finally, Rumors:
#1 : Yes - I'm going to Jamaica. The letters have been sent out for fundraising and I'm starting to work on my own parts (which are still a little unclear). I'm in the process of getting some children's programs done and then will be working on some general team building and devotional material. How that piece fits into a day is a little fuzzy but keeping things running smoothly will likely be what I will be doing...afterall - I am a Program Manager...it's kind of my job. In the end - I will serve God and do what He puts before me.
#2 : No more rumors. Maybe I'll be going back to AEE...maybe there might be something about me being on the Intercessory Prayer Team for Urbana 2012...but those are seriously rumors - I'll let you know when they turn into fact.
So that's that peeps. That's how I have felt about 2011 and what's to come in 2012. I hope it's been a cheery one for you and stay safe tonight. I need you all resoluting/renovating/reviving your comments on [ the clean slate ] and [ instigate change ] in 2012.
Resolutions. no. But I'll get back to that in a moment.
Responses. I have a few from 2011.
Renovations! Ya!
Revolutions. ... .... Maybe?
Rebellions. again...maybe...but I might keep that to myself.
Redo. Yes.
Revelations...that's deep - and yes, I have a few of those too.
Reactions. No. I choose to respond.
Revival - there's a bit of that too.
Rumors...haHA!
I always hate the whole...resolutions thing because they typically become reso-no-lution. I know a few people that were able to realistically give themselves goals to achieve the following year. But they were the 'goals-on-the-fridge-so-we-can-cross-them-off" kind of people. Good for them. Pat on the back. Even the word RE-SOLUTION gets me a little firey. Doesn't that kind of say that you had the solution once before and it didn't work and so you have to "re"-it? Doesn't really pave the road to long term success, does it.
Responses on Resolutions from 2011
Me? What did I say last yea?. Read more. That's a solid resolution. The goal was just...more. I did that. I finished the Cellist of Sarejevo AND the Bible once more through AND Forgotten God or wait...I did read the Clockwork Angel and the Clockwork Prince which are teen novels...does that count? That's a solid two more than I had read the previous year. I'm pathetic, I know. I think I actually read Forgotten God twice. Crazy Love and two other books lay started on my kitchen table. I really need to take a friend's advice and try audiobooks. Is it shameful that I don't even know where to find audiobooks? itunes maybe. Geh.
Part way through the year I also resolved to blog more...and blog consistently. True - I become less consistent when things are busy at the camp and all of my blogging turns into rugby...but I blogged consistently and if you compare my numbers of posts in 2011 to all previous years (added together). Whammy! I knocked that one out of the park. I don't plan on trying to beat my 2011 number. So there's no RE-solution needed. Just the resolve to keep doing what I'm doing...and maybe getting people commenting again - let's just say that there's a direct correlation to my rugby posts and commenting. One goes up and the other absolutely goes down. oh bother.
So instead of Resolutions this year - I'm writing or doing renovations. Some stuff is great and will still be there and maybe some stuff will get repurposed and some stuff just has to go. I'm not going to get into all of the reno details. But it was nice to start with new couches this last week to start the physcial stuff off swell. I also reno'd the blog...I figured it was time to clean the slate and give myself a background that reflects where I'm at now. Energy, a little chaos, and very busy in the next year.
Rebellion - well I have to...because I wouldn't be a black sheep without a little rebellion in my blood. I'm rebelling against Blackberrys. If I'm given a good opportunity to get out - I'm jumping ship to the iphone. I don't care about hype anymore. iphones are better...Blackberrys have issues - and they're not a family member so you do have to keep them around. Lose 'em while you can before they convince you that the next one will actually be better. Trust me - it won't. If anybody would like a torch and a 2 year contract...just let me know.
Revolutions:
#1 : This is a tough one and it's close to my heart. I want to be positive.
#2 : The next one starts with me too. Spiritual kick-start. I think I'm good. I'm in a "good" place. But I don't want to be in a good place. I want to be in a place where God is blowing my mind. Where I can honestly say that every encounter with him changes me - because every encounter with him SHOULD change me. And this change will impact through around me. I want to start a revolution.
Redo: I want to redo how I organized and worked with one of my teams this year. I didn't give them my best. And that's on me. People - my co-workers - my staff- my campers- my guests - should always get my best. Specifically this team - didn't. And I'm sorry for that and I wish I could get a redo - which I won't. But I want to have learned from it enough to not do it again.
Do AGAIN: I would also love to do William Fitzsimmons, U2 (except this time I would seat hop because concert-sitters are lame), and Foo Fighters again because they were ALL amazing concerts. And I would love to go back and do AEE in Florida again. Super fantastic. Did I mention that it was great?
Revelations:
I don't think this is the right place to share some of it but I think it will be sooner or later - some of it is still a little fresh and so I haven't completely dealt with all of the emotions. A couple of them came from the AEE conference which was so much more than I expected and from unexpected places in the conference. I was affirmed over and over and over again for who I was and was doing and how I was gifted. I felt beautiful for the first time in a long time. I felt valued. Not that I don't know these things in my home life but I think that as a whole, as Christians and maybe even Canadians (that's an enormous generalization but seriously I got tons of compliments down there), don't speak our compliments, our affirmations, and our praise to each other enough. We don't look each other in the eyes and tell them that they're doing good, that they're cherished, and that they have value. I have been practicing this in one area of my life but have not done that to the other people in my life enough. I'm going to change that.
Hand in hand with that though - my other revelation is that I cannot seek my worth and value and depend on affirmation from other people. That lays an expectation on them that they may not be able to meet. I must seek God for that.
Revival: Even as I type this...I've got a fire lit inside of me. If anything I have said sparks something in you or you have started to think what your Rs are...write them down. Make yourself accountable to them and make change.
The other revival that has happened is [ instigate change ]. It was actually the first blog I started and I don't know why I didn't just reno that one but I started [ the clean slate ] instead. Maybe because I felt I needed something unattached to the old one. The old one hung around and when Blogger made upgrades to their interface - there it was...the Bear's Den staring me in the face every time I logged in. After AEE I started journalling about my facilitator experiences and thought that it would be great to create a space where I could share the activities I do and what happens in the debrief - because they're all different. And then maybe someday - there will be conversations about other people's experience and maybe EVEN - other bloggers posting on it. So [instigate change ] started. Maybe that was the first reno of 2011. It doesn't really count towards 2012.
And finally, Rumors:
#1 : Yes - I'm going to Jamaica. The letters have been sent out for fundraising and I'm starting to work on my own parts (which are still a little unclear). I'm in the process of getting some children's programs done and then will be working on some general team building and devotional material. How that piece fits into a day is a little fuzzy but keeping things running smoothly will likely be what I will be doing...afterall - I am a Program Manager...it's kind of my job. In the end - I will serve God and do what He puts before me.
#2 : No more rumors. Maybe I'll be going back to AEE...maybe there might be something about me being on the Intercessory Prayer Team for Urbana 2012...but those are seriously rumors - I'll let you know when they turn into fact.
So that's that peeps. That's how I have felt about 2011 and what's to come in 2012. I hope it's been a cheery one for you and stay safe tonight. I need you all resoluting/renovating/reviving your comments on [ the clean slate ] and [ instigate change ] in 2012.
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